A few years ago I had the opportunity to be trained by one of my favorite people and a great mentor in facilitating a biographical timeline. (If you are interested in this and want more info. visit www.Dimagine.com and look for the article "Who holds your story?") Anyway, it's an incredible tool and I have had some of the most amazing professional and personal experiences because of it. I have had the opportunity to take incredible, inspiring and sometimes heartbreaking journey's and at least one of those experiences helped to make another person's life better, how fabulous is that?
For two days now I was back with my favorite mentor and some of the other people most dear to me. We began the same journey of those few years ago, except that this time I had the opportunity to assist in sharing what I have learned and help other's begin to learn this tool. What a great gift we shared! Not only did I now get to work side by side with a person who has affected my work and my life with inspiration and experience, but I got to share that experience with my best friends and co-workers, and inspire other's to use this tool and in so doing affect real change! By the end of today as I was exhausted though exhilarated, I looked around the room and saw some faces of people who were truly impacted and ready to begin this journey for themselves! How amazing is that? Two years ago I was excited at the prospect of being helpful to some, and I have, but now that experience has helped to inform others who now hope to do the same. So, I now played some small part in the prospect of being helpful to many. I have somehow come full circle and it is magical. I sometimes marvel at how truly fortunate I am. I hope that all who read this can experience this same level of...WHOA!
Note-Shameless Plug- http://www.beadforlife.org/ Please vist this site. It is an organization working toward ending poverty by helping women in Uganda work, and in the process make beautiful and unique jewelry. I ask every woman who reads this to at least visit and learn about what you can do to help our sister's accomplish thier dreams. I ask every man to buy a necklace for a woman they love!
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Evening at the park
OK my darlings, it's been a few days and I feel like writing, but I'm not sure I have whole lot to say today. I would like to report that I had a lovely evening with my oldest daughter at the park. While she is my oldest daughter, she is the middle child and with her older brother being the attention getter that he is and my youngest daughter being four, Savannah very often finds herself waiting for her own turn. So tonight we went to a local park together,just the two of us, we strolled and took in historic sights then my daughter played on the playground as I watched on. While we were there another little girl went charging over to Savannah and was very interested in what she was doing, they started jabbering away (Savannah is very much like me in that she is a social butterfly-she makes a new friend wherever she goes). Savannah and the other girl, whose name I learned was Mackenzie, jumped around and played, talked and looked at the clouds while I and Mackenzie's mother watched on.
Just before we left Mackenzie came over and began to talk to me. I would guess by her size that she was about 7 or 8, she had bright blue eye's and was full of interest in me and Savannah, when she spoke to me I realized there was something familiar about the way she spoke and the things she said were interesting, though not what I am used to hearing from most kids. I realized that she had autism -not that a person's label is important, and Mackenzie was far more than any label- but I recognized why her mother watched so closely and why every now then she had gone closer to offer Mackenzie prompts. Savannah, my lovely daughter never batted an eyelash, she played with Mackenzie and even followed her somewhat bossy commands without complaining, asking to leave or joining other children instead. When we left the park she never said a thing about it, just that Mackenzie was nice. Now I know that Savannah "knows," but she didn't need to talk about it, or hide with the other kids, she just went about her business and made a new friend and that was that. Maybe she's better at accepting others than I, she never said a word, but I've just come home and blogged about a little girl because she has autism. I'm proud that my daughter is who she is and that she loves everyone without thought or concern for her own "reputation," I hope I and other's can grow to be more like her. What a cool kid I have!
Just before we left Mackenzie came over and began to talk to me. I would guess by her size that she was about 7 or 8, she had bright blue eye's and was full of interest in me and Savannah, when she spoke to me I realized there was something familiar about the way she spoke and the things she said were interesting, though not what I am used to hearing from most kids. I realized that she had autism -not that a person's label is important, and Mackenzie was far more than any label- but I recognized why her mother watched so closely and why every now then she had gone closer to offer Mackenzie prompts. Savannah, my lovely daughter never batted an eyelash, she played with Mackenzie and even followed her somewhat bossy commands without complaining, asking to leave or joining other children instead. When we left the park she never said a thing about it, just that Mackenzie was nice. Now I know that Savannah "knows," but she didn't need to talk about it, or hide with the other kids, she just went about her business and made a new friend and that was that. Maybe she's better at accepting others than I, she never said a word, but I've just come home and blogged about a little girl because she has autism. I'm proud that my daughter is who she is and that she loves everyone without thought or concern for her own "reputation," I hope I and other's can grow to be more like her. What a cool kid I have!
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Terror at a local school
The other night I heard a snippet on the local news which caught my interest. I was on my way to bed but stopped in my tracks when I heard a story about a girl's family suing a local school. The suit is being pursued because the 14 yr old girl and four other's were sexually assaulted repeatedly, yet when they informed the school the boy they accused was asked to apologize and received a three day suspension. He later violently raped the girls, even leaving a blood smeared hand print as a "trophy" in the stairwell where he committed the act. The hand print remained for several days and was still there when he dragged the girl who is suing by her hair into the same stairwell and raped her as well.
At this point the boy has been charged, but as I listened to the story I was baffled as to why school officials had not acted sooner after initial reports...then I heard it, the brief mention at the end of the report that all five survivors are girls enrolled in the school's special education program. Immediately I was angered as the realization hit me that the school didn't act because it questioned the "credibility" of the girls. This may or may not be the case, but for me it rings true. The girls were in essence asked to hush as the school swept the incident under the carpet.
After seeing this, and hearing of earlier attacks in local schools I am increasingly concerned about what is happening in what should be a safe environment. I am concerned that schools are not being proactive, they are not acting when there is a problem. I would like to know that at my children's schools students are not only being taught about math and history, but they are also being taught about diversity, acceptance, personal power and how to report problems. I know for a fact that at the school my children attend these issues have never been addressed as they might apply to all students. Well I'm mad, and I'm worried and I have a BIG mouth! So between now and the new school year they are going to hear from me and every student and parent I can rally to join me to ensure that starting now the school's really start working toward inclusion and safety above all else! I encourage you to contact your own schools, find a list of local resources where you can refer them for support and then don't let it drop! If schools are proactive and promote safety and awareness these things can be prevented. If students are educated they can protect themselves and others, and perhaps think twice before hurting a fellow student.
************************************************************************************
To read about this story visit the link below.
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/08183/893901-52.stm
At this point the boy has been charged, but as I listened to the story I was baffled as to why school officials had not acted sooner after initial reports...then I heard it, the brief mention at the end of the report that all five survivors are girls enrolled in the school's special education program. Immediately I was angered as the realization hit me that the school didn't act because it questioned the "credibility" of the girls. This may or may not be the case, but for me it rings true. The girls were in essence asked to hush as the school swept the incident under the carpet.
After seeing this, and hearing of earlier attacks in local schools I am increasingly concerned about what is happening in what should be a safe environment. I am concerned that schools are not being proactive, they are not acting when there is a problem. I would like to know that at my children's schools students are not only being taught about math and history, but they are also being taught about diversity, acceptance, personal power and how to report problems. I know for a fact that at the school my children attend these issues have never been addressed as they might apply to all students. Well I'm mad, and I'm worried and I have a BIG mouth! So between now and the new school year they are going to hear from me and every student and parent I can rally to join me to ensure that starting now the school's really start working toward inclusion and safety above all else! I encourage you to contact your own schools, find a list of local resources where you can refer them for support and then don't let it drop! If schools are proactive and promote safety and awareness these things can be prevented. If students are educated they can protect themselves and others, and perhaps think twice before hurting a fellow student.
************************************************************************************
To read about this story visit the link below.
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/08183/893901-52.stm
Sunday, June 29, 2008
When the student is ready....
In the past year I had a professor who quoted to me several times "when the student is ready, the teacher will come." She turned out to be one heck of a teacher. I realize how lucky I am to have had so many amazing people who have come in and out of my life who have inspired me, taught me a lesson however large or small, and somehow impacted me for the better.
I think the first time this happened was when I was very young. His name was Ron Tucker and he was my oboe instructor. He was passionate about his music, kind and inspiring. He was a great male role model when I needed one, and his passion for what he did inspired me to always strive to do something I was passionate about. Long ago that was music, my dream was to be a classical musician living in a loft in New York, eventually that dream transformed into something very different yet I'm still as passionate about my work as Ron was about his oboe and bassoon. Each time I hear Ravel or the notes from Sheherazade, I'm reminded of that passion.
I didn't feel that way again about a teacher for a very long time. Not until much later when I was working direct support and sent to a training. From that moment on, I was inspired to do something, to change my approach. Later, from this same teacher I learned not only about what I wanted to be professionally, but I also learned how to be a better mother, friend, lover, daughter etc...I am forever grateful to Guy who taught me these things.
I have always wanted to travel the world, in my younger idealistic days I would travel abroad and make a difference. After having children I though this would never happen, yet I met a professor, Dr. P, who has stirred in me the desire to follow my heart even if it is abroad, and through him I have learned that it is possible, children or not. He's a great man doing great things and I like so many other's have had the opportunity to see and hear his passion for what he believes in.
I had a professor earlier this year, Dr. B, who made such a difference for me that I returned to the Church, I opened my eyes and my heart and followed it home, and without her I think it would have taken a lot longer.
I've also had teacher's in people who don't necessarily carry the title. My son has taught me some of the most powerful lesson's I believe I will ever learn. My mother, my daughter's, my husband they all help me learn and grow each day. My friends, my co worker's, my wise guardian and fierce leader, they all teach me on an on-going basis.
I have been so fortunate in my life to have had so many great mentor's, teacher's and friends. But I think those lesson's surround us, they always there, waiting to be learned but we have to be ready. So I guess, really I'm fortunate that not only did all these great people come into my life, but that I was somehow ready for the lessons they needed to teach me.
Open your heart and your mind to the world around you, pay attention and soak it all in! You may not realize it at the time, but when you are ready, your teacher will come.
I think the first time this happened was when I was very young. His name was Ron Tucker and he was my oboe instructor. He was passionate about his music, kind and inspiring. He was a great male role model when I needed one, and his passion for what he did inspired me to always strive to do something I was passionate about. Long ago that was music, my dream was to be a classical musician living in a loft in New York, eventually that dream transformed into something very different yet I'm still as passionate about my work as Ron was about his oboe and bassoon. Each time I hear Ravel or the notes from Sheherazade, I'm reminded of that passion.
I didn't feel that way again about a teacher for a very long time. Not until much later when I was working direct support and sent to a training. From that moment on, I was inspired to do something, to change my approach. Later, from this same teacher I learned not only about what I wanted to be professionally, but I also learned how to be a better mother, friend, lover, daughter etc...I am forever grateful to Guy who taught me these things.
I have always wanted to travel the world, in my younger idealistic days I would travel abroad and make a difference. After having children I though this would never happen, yet I met a professor, Dr. P, who has stirred in me the desire to follow my heart even if it is abroad, and through him I have learned that it is possible, children or not. He's a great man doing great things and I like so many other's have had the opportunity to see and hear his passion for what he believes in.
I had a professor earlier this year, Dr. B, who made such a difference for me that I returned to the Church, I opened my eyes and my heart and followed it home, and without her I think it would have taken a lot longer.
I've also had teacher's in people who don't necessarily carry the title. My son has taught me some of the most powerful lesson's I believe I will ever learn. My mother, my daughter's, my husband they all help me learn and grow each day. My friends, my co worker's, my wise guardian and fierce leader, they all teach me on an on-going basis.
I have been so fortunate in my life to have had so many great mentor's, teacher's and friends. But I think those lesson's surround us, they always there, waiting to be learned but we have to be ready. So I guess, really I'm fortunate that not only did all these great people come into my life, but that I was somehow ready for the lessons they needed to teach me.
Open your heart and your mind to the world around you, pay attention and soak it all in! You may not realize it at the time, but when you are ready, your teacher will come.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Shanked
Today is another not so hot day- I feel just plain cruddy, but I'm not whining.
After an amuzing e-mail conversation with my wise guadian today, I have been struck by some responses to those strangers who inquire about my gait. (After today I won't whine anymore).
So here goes, when strangers ask "what happened to you?" I could respond with:
I was shanked in the leg while in prison,
Old war injury, shrapnil is still in there
Football injury, ruined my pro career
I'm drunk
You're drunk, I'm walking fine
Shark attack while swimming in lake Erie
Just got off my horse, he's parked around the corner
I injured it practicing the karma sutra
Parenting is rough
Ya know that magic trick where the magician traps you in a box and saws you in half?
When was the last time you had sex?
Sarcasm is funny! I know all these responses are rude and definitely not non-violent,but sometimes it would be nice to respond to rude questions with a rude comeback. Okay, I'm done with that now, I promise tomorrow I'll be back to my perky and empathetic self!
After an amuzing e-mail conversation with my wise guadian today, I have been struck by some responses to those strangers who inquire about my gait. (After today I won't whine anymore).
So here goes, when strangers ask "what happened to you?" I could respond with:
I was shanked in the leg while in prison,
Old war injury, shrapnil is still in there
Football injury, ruined my pro career
I'm drunk
You're drunk, I'm walking fine
Shark attack while swimming in lake Erie
Just got off my horse, he's parked around the corner
I injured it practicing the karma sutra
Parenting is rough
Ya know that magic trick where the magician traps you in a box and saws you in half?
When was the last time you had sex?
Sarcasm is funny! I know all these responses are rude and definitely not non-violent,but sometimes it would be nice to respond to rude questions with a rude comeback. Okay, I'm done with that now, I promise tomorrow I'll be back to my perky and empathetic self!
Monday, June 23, 2008
Bad Day
I had a rough weekend. It started with going to pick up my car which cost significantly more than I had hoped, there went my son's birthday party and season tickets to the local amusement park...but I had my car back, and she was running smoothly, thank you Bill the mechanic! As depressing as that expense was, I usually don't let things get me down...but then my leg decided to do it's best impression of a sausage! My right leg and foot are horribly swollen and tight, I attribute it to the psoriatic arthritis. I went to the urgent care facility nearby and while waiting there I saw an older woman come in. I believe she had probably fallen as she was holding her bottom and having obvious difficulty walking. She sat down and I noticed her legs...they looked like mine. She was in her eighties, I in my thirties, this didn't seem right.
I came home for the first time and cried about this lovely autoimmune disorder. I didn't feel that I should feel sorry for myself, or that the PA is necessarily "bad" it has just become a new part of my life, something that I have to make accommodations for. This weekend though for the first time I cried because I am in pain, I cried because I am tired, I cried because my body doesn't work like a 33 year old's body is "suppose" to work. Got that out of my system and moved on.
Then today I became angry. The funny thing with my PA is that it isn't something that people can generally see, when it is visible via my limp or the oh so sexy T.E.D. hose I so fashionably donned today, people suddenly feel they have the right to inquire about my medical history. I don't mean people who know me, and are concerned when they see have difficulty getting around, I mean complete strangers! When I limp, strangers think they can say, "hey, did you hurt yourself?" or "ooh, what happened." A short answer like no I didn't injure myself is never satisfactory and they want to know more, and me being me, I politely offer my medical history.
This evening I was waiting for my son while he had an appointment and a complete stranger who saw me sitting and waiting asked "what happened?" I tried to brush it off with a polite answer, but he continued, saying how neat T.E.D hose are. Does he know what he is talking about? Has he ever had to wear these awful, itchy, completely unfashionable things? My anger at the hundreds of rude people who have inquired about my limp or my hose boiled over, and rather rudely I responded by saying "yeah, they're great to need at 33 years old, and they bring such nice attention." Immediately I felt awful as he quickly excused himself, and wished me "luck with that."
So, I feel bad because I was terribly mean to a stranger, I'm angry that people are so darn nosey, and frustrated that my body has changed and I must adjust. I will try not to be so rude again in the future, but honestly, I feel as if I should just put a sign around my neck detailing my medical records! So if you see me, limping around somewhere, compliment me on my clothes, my great fashion sense, or great lipstick, but please don't point and stare at my hose or ask me what happened, results could be hazardous!
I came home for the first time and cried about this lovely autoimmune disorder. I didn't feel that I should feel sorry for myself, or that the PA is necessarily "bad" it has just become a new part of my life, something that I have to make accommodations for. This weekend though for the first time I cried because I am in pain, I cried because I am tired, I cried because my body doesn't work like a 33 year old's body is "suppose" to work. Got that out of my system and moved on.
Then today I became angry. The funny thing with my PA is that it isn't something that people can generally see, when it is visible via my limp or the oh so sexy T.E.D. hose I so fashionably donned today, people suddenly feel they have the right to inquire about my medical history. I don't mean people who know me, and are concerned when they see have difficulty getting around, I mean complete strangers! When I limp, strangers think they can say, "hey, did you hurt yourself?" or "ooh, what happened." A short answer like no I didn't injure myself is never satisfactory and they want to know more, and me being me, I politely offer my medical history.
This evening I was waiting for my son while he had an appointment and a complete stranger who saw me sitting and waiting asked "what happened?" I tried to brush it off with a polite answer, but he continued, saying how neat T.E.D hose are. Does he know what he is talking about? Has he ever had to wear these awful, itchy, completely unfashionable things? My anger at the hundreds of rude people who have inquired about my limp or my hose boiled over, and rather rudely I responded by saying "yeah, they're great to need at 33 years old, and they bring such nice attention." Immediately I felt awful as he quickly excused himself, and wished me "luck with that."
So, I feel bad because I was terribly mean to a stranger, I'm angry that people are so darn nosey, and frustrated that my body has changed and I must adjust. I will try not to be so rude again in the future, but honestly, I feel as if I should just put a sign around my neck detailing my medical records! So if you see me, limping around somewhere, compliment me on my clothes, my great fashion sense, or great lipstick, but please don't point and stare at my hose or ask me what happened, results could be hazardous!
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Wake up! (world update)
According to Amnesty Internationals 2008 report, which you can access and view for yourself at http://thereport.amnesty.org/eng/report-08-at-a-glance, revealed that people are still not allowed to speak freely in over 77 countries across the globe. Additionally, 54 countries still maintain unfair trials and often abuse within the penal system, while in at least 81 countries people continue to be tortured or ill treated. In Ethiopia alone the army carries out executions, rape and torture, but this is widespread across many nations, particularly those struggling with extreme poverty and oppression.
AI made several recommendations for the coming year which includes a challenge to China to uphold the promise to allow freedom of speech and free press, also urging them to end "re-education through labor" programs. They also challenge Russia to allow for political dissent and allow no "impunity" on the human rights violations occurring in Chechnya. Finally, the U.S. is urged to close Guantanamo Bay and other secret detention facilities and allow for fair trial. Additionally the U.S. is urged to end the torture and ill treatment of prisoners within these systems. Several countries were asked to end the practice of rendition.
People's human rights are violated on a routine basis across the globe, yet few of us pay attention. What's worse is that not all human rights violations are viewed in the same way. While people with disabilities are being neglected, abused, tortured and killed across the globe, Amnesty International barely offers this issue any recognition. With attention these situations can change. Reports from 1994-1997 revealing the severe neglect and abuse of children with disabilities in Russian orphanages, caused a small uproar that led to organizations standing up to promote change. Volunteers began to work to provide daily needs in these facilities and since these children's have have changed! They are no longer malnourished and neglected and treatment continues to improve. Yet, in Ireland patients with mental health disorders and disabilities are forced to stay in long term wards and are neglected and abused, and although attention was brought to the situation in the past few years, the country is still cited for inadequate inspection and care in organizations meant to support people with disabilities. The most horrible pictures and reports I have seen came out of Romania. Young children with disabilities tied to beds, bony from malnutrition and languishing in a state of neglect. These atrocities are not listed high in the priorities of Amnesty International and other organizations. I say this is much a human rights violation as any other and it's time people recognized it as such! All human rights abuses should stop, but we need to include the rights of people with disabilities along with everyone elses!
Stand up, say something, pay attention and GET INVOLVED! Even if it is as small as writing a letter or telling someone else, please send a message that the violation of rights of people with disabilities is just as important to us and as criminal as the violent acts carried out against non-disabled people.
___________________________________________________________________________________
For more info. on Romania visit these links:
"Disabled Children Confined and Abused in Romania" (ABC News)
http://www.abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=1941485&page=1
Video: "Orphans 'Near Death' in Romania" (ABC News)
http://www.abcnews.go.com/Video/playerIndex?id=1944838
Report: "Romania’s Segregation and Abuse of Infants and Children with Disabilities" (Mental Disability Rights International)
http://www.mdri.org/projects/romania/romania-May%209%20final.pdf
"Romania Acknowledges Child Care Problems" (Associated Press via Newsday)
http://www.inclusiondaily.com/news/06/red/0510a.htm
"EP member: international adoptions not a solution for institutionalized children" (Bucharest Daily News)
http://www.daily-news.ro/article_detail.php?idarticle=26037
AI made several recommendations for the coming year which includes a challenge to China to uphold the promise to allow freedom of speech and free press, also urging them to end "re-education through labor" programs. They also challenge Russia to allow for political dissent and allow no "impunity" on the human rights violations occurring in Chechnya. Finally, the U.S. is urged to close Guantanamo Bay and other secret detention facilities and allow for fair trial. Additionally the U.S. is urged to end the torture and ill treatment of prisoners within these systems. Several countries were asked to end the practice of rendition.
People's human rights are violated on a routine basis across the globe, yet few of us pay attention. What's worse is that not all human rights violations are viewed in the same way. While people with disabilities are being neglected, abused, tortured and killed across the globe, Amnesty International barely offers this issue any recognition. With attention these situations can change. Reports from 1994-1997 revealing the severe neglect and abuse of children with disabilities in Russian orphanages, caused a small uproar that led to organizations standing up to promote change. Volunteers began to work to provide daily needs in these facilities and since these children's have have changed! They are no longer malnourished and neglected and treatment continues to improve. Yet, in Ireland patients with mental health disorders and disabilities are forced to stay in long term wards and are neglected and abused, and although attention was brought to the situation in the past few years, the country is still cited for inadequate inspection and care in organizations meant to support people with disabilities. The most horrible pictures and reports I have seen came out of Romania. Young children with disabilities tied to beds, bony from malnutrition and languishing in a state of neglect. These atrocities are not listed high in the priorities of Amnesty International and other organizations. I say this is much a human rights violation as any other and it's time people recognized it as such! All human rights abuses should stop, but we need to include the rights of people with disabilities along with everyone elses!
Stand up, say something, pay attention and GET INVOLVED! Even if it is as small as writing a letter or telling someone else, please send a message that the violation of rights of people with disabilities is just as important to us and as criminal as the violent acts carried out against non-disabled people.
___________________________________________________________________________________
For more info. on Romania visit these links:
"Disabled Children Confined and Abused in Romania" (ABC News)
http://www.abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=1941485&page=1
Video: "Orphans 'Near Death' in Romania" (ABC News)
http://www.abcnews.go.com/Video/playerIndex?id=1944838
Report: "Romania’s Segregation and Abuse of Infants and Children with Disabilities" (Mental Disability Rights International)
http://www.mdri.org/projects/romania/romania-May%209%20final.pdf
"Romania Acknowledges Child Care Problems" (Associated Press via Newsday)
http://www.inclusiondaily.com/news/06/red/0510a.htm
"EP member: international adoptions not a solution for institutionalized children" (Bucharest Daily News)
http://www.daily-news.ro/article_detail.php?idarticle=26037
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