Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Sand Through the Hour Glass

Well, it has been a very long time since I posted anything. I didn't intend not to post, time just seems to have gotten away from me and with no spare time my creative juices have been running on short supply!

Speaking of time slipping away...My son will turn 13 in July. I don't know where the time has gone, and his becoming a teenager troubles me on a variety of levels. First of all I will officially be RAISING A TEENAGER, and frankly I'm not sure how qualified I am for that one, and secondly it reminds me that I too am aging and as I contemplate my own mortality I wonder what my existence on this planet will mean, if anything.

As a younger me, I had plans to change the world, at one time through music at another as some crusading marauder for peace and equality across the planet. Now I've found that I've come to a place where I'm still trying to decide what I want to be when I grow up. I know that I want to continue working and advocating for and with people with intellectual disabilities...but how? I keep going back to school as if the answer will somehow appear and yet I have no more clarity today than I did yesterday. I'm guessing that many people start question their place in the world at one time or another, so I know I'm not alone, but it's a precarious place to be...

But, what keeps popping into my head, as silly as it will sound, is some Miley Cyrus song (my kids love her, so I too am subjected to her music), and it says something about climbing a mountain, It's not about getting there, it's the journey...something cheesy along those lines anyway. Well here's the thing, while I'd love some macaroni with all that cheese, it's true! It is all about the journey, and I keep forgetting to stop and pick some flowers and take it all in, I've been too busy worrying about the end result. The end result doesn't matter, it's great to have goals, but when does life ever turn out like intended? Yet, somehow things have always seemed to turn out in some cosmic, Divine way that's always so much better than what I ever could have planned.

So I am taking some time right now to think about my journey and how it's made me into who I am and brought me to all the good in my life. Then I'm going to stop and take some time to enjoy the trip, because that's what life heck of an unbelievable trip!


rickismom said...

First, welcome back! Missed your blogs!

I think that few of us have a BIG impact that we can see... but we effect friends, children, neighbors, ... and maybe even blog readers! I know that I feel that if my kids all turn out to be good, moral, normal peiople, that's pretty good.

As for raising teens: Hold on tight, and keep in mind that they become somewhat normal again after 20!

FAB said...

I'm strapping myself in!

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